How Your Wife Fits Into Your Life

Dating, Marriage|

Well, in marriage, the lessons just keep on coming. And I’m committed to keep sharing what I’m learning just in case it helps someone else. I know all of my single friends want to get married, and I want them to get married as well. (Immediately!) But the more wisdom you can gain right now will save you a lot of headache and heartache down the road. So let’s get ...

Do You Take Your Partner for Granted?

Dating, Marriage|

Rachel and I share a king-sized bed. Oh man, a king-sized bed is the best. I know everyone can’t currently have one because their bedroom or budget may not accommodate it, but I hope that everyone eventually gets one. Really. The reason why is because of S-P-A-C-E. Space! I love space. I need space. While I technically can fall asleep while spooning Rachel, I much prefer to have as much ...

When My Mouth Gets Me In Trouble

Dating, Marriage|

So, I really didn’t know the power of my words until I got married - when I began to fully and completely do life with another individual. And though I quickly caught a glimpse of this during the first six months of marriage, my eyes are still constantly being opened to this reality. I’ve realized that when I am with co-workers or at church or small group or playing sports ...

What Are You Competing For?

Dating, Marriage|

I’ve been thinking a lot about competition recently, and how it relates to the things I want in my life. When I was in high school, I competed with my peers to get straight As (predictable, I know!), to know more about professional sports teams, and to be more athletic – whether it was a better crossover dribble on the driveway when we were playing pickup basketball, or becoming more ...

The Most Important Thing You Can Ask Your Mate

Dating, Marriage|

Whether you’ve been in a relationship for a few weeks, a few months, or a few years, you’ve learned that communication is critical and foundational for things to work out. Some of us are naturally good at expressing our feelings and our needs, while many of us struggle to share personal thoughts that would help us love our partner well, and be loved well in return. We all want to ...

The Importance of Non-Sexual Touch

Dating, Marriage|

When we were dating, I wanted to touch Rachel all of the time. I remember shaking her hand when first meeting her. I remember teaching her how to juggle, and having her stand right next to me, with her left hip touching my right hip. I remember our first high-five, and our first playful bump into each other. And I remember when I put my hand around her shoulder for ...

When God is Close to the Brokenhearted

Dating|

There was this one time where I really loved this girl, and she loved me back, but things got jacked up because life is broken and people are broken and mistakes are made. In this relationship, most days were really, really great. But there was one day when something happened and my heart was shattered into a million pieces. I can’t get into the details, but I feel like most ...

How to Get Over the Girl

Courage, Dating|

So there was this one time where I really liked a particular girl.  It was way back in 2005.  She was all wrong for me, but I still wanted it to work, and gave it my all because I thought it just might.  I would be sweet and endearing and thoughtful.  I would demonstrate in meaningful ways how much I cared about her and her family.  I would put in ...

Are You Safe To Be Yourself in Your Marriage?

Dating, Marriage|

Lately I have been reflecting on the passion, energy, and effort involved when a guy really likes a girl and just wants to be with her. You know, when he's past the uncertainty and has made up his mind that she's the one for him for forever, and he goes all gung-ho pursuing her and trying to win her heart. I mean, this hypothetical guy spends time in the gym ...

When Love Starts to Become Conditional

Dating, Marriage|

When I was first falling for Rachel, I tried to do everything to win her heart. I remember teaching her how to juggle, and showing her how to play guitar. I remember writing her poems and letters, and talking with her on the phone for hours, and gladly giving up time I could spend doing the things I’ve always done (my work, my fitness, whatever) just so that I could ...