As I’ve looked around at the marriages I love, and honestly looked inward at my own, I’ve noticed something unsettling. My parents, Rachel’s parents, Rachel and me - when we’re tired, we get short with each other. When our bodies hurt, we get short with each other. The person who gets the worst version of us is almost never a stranger or a coworker. It’s the one we’ve promised our ...
Childlike faith is a simple, trusting confidence in God. It's similar to the kind a young child naturally has toward a loving parent. It means believing for the best without suspicion, cynicism, or fear. It is not naive, and it is not childish. Instead, it is choosing to trust the goodness of God's plans, even on the days when life hands you every reason not to. I named this entire ...
Did you know that the traditional gift to mark ten years of marriage is tin or aluminum? Apparently, those metals symbolize the flexibility and durability required to last a decade together. Okay, I guess. That feels a little underwhelming to me. But when I learned the modern gift for ten years is diamonds, that seemed overwhelming. Shouldn’t diamonds signify way bigger milestones further down the road? Regardless, I didn’t give ...
Well, I should’ve posted this last summer - but hey, better late than never, right? Being married for nine years has changed me in ways I never saw coming. Rachel could tell you all about how I’ve grown up (in areas I didn’t even know needed work), and honestly, I feel more grounded, more stable, and - this is a big one - I actually like me more than I ...
Rachel and I completed ten years of knowing each other and eight years of marriage last year, and I’m glad to honestly be able to say we are doing great. The guys I know don’t really talk about their marriages with one another, and so I have no reference point; I just have learned that putting my wife’s needs first is what I am called to do and what I ...
I have been watching a show on Hulu for the last few months, and I am enamored by it. I am sure I am suffering from recency bias but I have been making claims to anyone who will listen that “this is the best show ever” and “there could never be a show more amazing than this one.” It’s called 24. Yes, you know the one – with Kiefer Sutherland. ...
If you live in or around Jupiter, Florida, you’re likely familiar with the fact that over the last couple of years, there have been a lot of shark teeth found on our local beaches. The reason is that there was a major offshore dredging project done to pump sand onto the shores and thereby replace all that which had eroded over time. This has churned up thousands of shark teeth, ...
It is nonstop when I am with them. “Look at me, Daddy!” “Watch me, Daddy!” “Daddy come over here!” “Daddy, are you listening?” “Daddy, will you play with me?” “Hey…. Hey…. Hey… Hey DAD!!!!!”. I get it. It makes sense. They want my attention. But even more, they want me to delight in them – no matter what it is they are doing. Sometimes it’s bellyflopping from the love seat ...
Rachel told me a while back that the seventh year of marriage is supposedly the hardest, with statistics showing that half of married couples who divorce do so by this point. I had never heard of this concept, but apparently, it’s a “thing” – and related to the “seven-year itch” (i.e., the desire to have an affair). With this in mind, and as I’ve done with our six month, one year, two ...
Hooray! Happy Anniversary to me! To Rachel! To us! That also means it’s time to share what I have been learning in marriage! Yep, the lessons keep coming. I think they will never stop, even twenty or thirty years into this thing (God willing!). I’ve written out what I’ve learned at our six month, one year, two year, three year, four year, and five year anniversaries, and hope you find my reflections helpful in ...